December Blog Challenge… Anxiety

Today's topic is brought to you by The Daily Post.

Anxiety: Write about a noise — or even a silence — that won’t go away. 

Talk about a sobering topic! Very timely since I had a 'not so great' anxiety day yesterday.

There is one silence that I cannot shake. The silence right before you get a phone call. A drugged out of their mind person on the other end of the phone mumbling "Jessica, I did something stupid. I need you to take me to the hospital."

If I could go the rest of my life NEVER receiving a phone call like that again, there would be no complaints from me. There are no guarantees in life, so I must wait. In that awful silence. The silence that causes a permanent lump in your belly. The lump that makes you nauseated all the time.  The nauseousness that makes it so hard to breath.

I try to focus on anything else. Throw myself into a flurry of productivity, which eventually leads to burn out. I'm not sure how else to deal with the silence. The never wavering, always there silence. It has become an unwanted friend. Maybe I need to name him and embrace him. I'm scared that embracing him will be the beginning of my demise.

It's going to be hard to push the publish button on this one...